And so entereth the Bob...
And so entereth the great and almighty Bob so he can finally attain the object of his lusty desireyness and stuff! JOHNNY DEPP! Oh Johnny how I love thee, let me count the ways!
1. The way you masterfully were a captain of the utmost sexiness and gorgeousness (besides me of course).
2. The way you made me squeal and giggle as the creepily sexy willy wonka (even though those gloves may have been a little overboard, my golly were you still hot).
3. The way you gaze out at me with those beautiful eyes in every interview and movie, yes Johnny, I know that you're looking at me, I know, you don't need to hide it any longer, all others cannot resist me, YOU ARE NO DIFFERENT!
4. The way you had the sexy writer going on in that one movie that I don't remember the title too but still remember how sexy you looked because that was the only reason I even watched it my dear Johnny!
5. The way you walked as Captain Jack Sparrow, oh yes!
6. The way you gave those filthy children their due as willy wonka not only with quick wit but with horribly wonderful devices :D LIKE SQUIRRELS!
7. The way your pants fit around your supple bottom.
8. The way your lips move as you speak!
9. I'm not gay.
10. No, really, I'm not, I'm dating a girl.
11. NO! G-I-R-L! Me, date, GIRL!
12. NO it's not a guy pretending to be a girl!
13. OH YOU WANNA GET RUDE DO YOU! I'LL JUMP RIGHT OUT OF YOUR SCREEN AND NIBBLE OFF YOUR NOSE THEN STUFF IT IN YOUR EAR THEN I'LL NIBBLE THAT OFF TOO AND STUFF IT IN YOUR OTHER EAR AND WHAT HAPPENS THEN RIGHTO YOUR OTHER EAR NIBBLED OFF BABY THAT THE END? OH NO BABY THEN I TAKE THAT EAR STUFFED WITH YOUR OTHER EAR AND YOUR NOSE AND I STUFF IT DOWN YOUR PANTS AND MAKE YOU DO A LITTLE JIG FOR MY AMUSEMENT YEAH THAT'S RIGHT *gets tackled by his minions and calmed*
14. *runs hand through ruffled hair and adjusts glasses, ahem* I apologize for that horribly uncalled for outburst. I have issues, and I am completely and utterly insane and manic, I also am complete and pure evil...but this is no excuse. So please accept my apology, and I am sorry for threatening all that I did.
15. CAUSE I MEANT TO SAY I'D BEAT YOU WITH A PETRIFIED MONKEY MUMMY FROM EGYPT UNTIL YOU'RE ON THE GROUND CRYING BECAUSE IT HURTS AND THERE ARE LITTLE CRUSTY MONKEY BITS ON YOU AND THEN I'LL TAKE A PEN AND CLICKY CLICK IT IN YOUR EAR OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER TILL YOU'RE WAILING WITH MADNESS AND THEN I'LL STUFF IT IN YOUR *gets tackled again*
16. *20 minutes of squealing and threatening later* ... *Ahems* I apologize, I was out of line with that. Sometimes, I just get so excited when I talk about Johnny Depp, that I want to beat people with petrified mummy monkies...it happens to all of us in our lives at one point or another, can you really blame me? YES?! WHY YOU DIRTY LITTLE PIECE OF POTATO POO I'LL NIBBLE OFF YOUR TOES AND FINGERS AND *tackled*
17. *30 minutes later* ... *Ahems* I'm calm this time I swear. Julie, I want my johnny, I promise I won't kill anybody, or beat anybody with a petrified mummy monkey, just give me my Depp, GIVE ME NOW! We're going to go to vegas and marry and make babies! PERFECT LITTLE BOBDEPP BABIES YES GLORIOUS BABIES! AND AS FOR YOU MR. BACK TALK ME WHILE I'M POSTING YOU JUST WAIT TILL I FIND OUT WHERE YOU LIVE BECAUSE I'M GOING TO SICK MY RABID LASER EYED MONKEY SPRINKLES ON YOU AND WATCH IT FRY OFF YOUR BELLY BUTTON AHAHAHAHAAH *tackled and knocked unconcious*
18. *drooling, half unconcious* jooooooooooooooooooooooooohnny.....baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabies......
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaant......
1. The way you masterfully were a captain of the utmost sexiness and gorgeousness (besides me of course).
2. The way you made me squeal and giggle as the creepily sexy willy wonka (even though those gloves may have been a little overboard, my golly were you still hot).
3. The way you gaze out at me with those beautiful eyes in every interview and movie, yes Johnny, I know that you're looking at me, I know, you don't need to hide it any longer, all others cannot resist me, YOU ARE NO DIFFERENT!
4. The way you had the sexy writer going on in that one movie that I don't remember the title too but still remember how sexy you looked because that was the only reason I even watched it my dear Johnny!
5. The way you walked as Captain Jack Sparrow, oh yes!
6. The way you gave those filthy children their due as willy wonka not only with quick wit but with horribly wonderful devices :D LIKE SQUIRRELS!
7. The way your pants fit around your supple bottom.
8. The way your lips move as you speak!
9. I'm not gay.
10. No, really, I'm not, I'm dating a girl.
11. NO! G-I-R-L! Me, date, GIRL!
12. NO it's not a guy pretending to be a girl!
13. OH YOU WANNA GET RUDE DO YOU! I'LL JUMP RIGHT OUT OF YOUR SCREEN AND NIBBLE OFF YOUR NOSE THEN STUFF IT IN YOUR EAR THEN I'LL NIBBLE THAT OFF TOO AND STUFF IT IN YOUR OTHER EAR AND WHAT HAPPENS THEN RIGHTO YOUR OTHER EAR NIBBLED OFF BABY THAT THE END? OH NO BABY THEN I TAKE THAT EAR STUFFED WITH YOUR OTHER EAR AND YOUR NOSE AND I STUFF IT DOWN YOUR PANTS AND MAKE YOU DO A LITTLE JIG FOR MY AMUSEMENT YEAH THAT'S RIGHT *gets tackled by his minions and calmed*
14. *runs hand through ruffled hair and adjusts glasses, ahem* I apologize for that horribly uncalled for outburst. I have issues, and I am completely and utterly insane and manic, I also am complete and pure evil...but this is no excuse. So please accept my apology, and I am sorry for threatening all that I did.
15. CAUSE I MEANT TO SAY I'D BEAT YOU WITH A PETRIFIED MONKEY MUMMY FROM EGYPT UNTIL YOU'RE ON THE GROUND CRYING BECAUSE IT HURTS AND THERE ARE LITTLE CRUSTY MONKEY BITS ON YOU AND THEN I'LL TAKE A PEN AND CLICKY CLICK IT IN YOUR EAR OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER TILL YOU'RE WAILING WITH MADNESS AND THEN I'LL STUFF IT IN YOUR *gets tackled again*
16. *20 minutes of squealing and threatening later* ... *Ahems* I apologize, I was out of line with that. Sometimes, I just get so excited when I talk about Johnny Depp, that I want to beat people with petrified mummy monkies...it happens to all of us in our lives at one point or another, can you really blame me? YES?! WHY YOU DIRTY LITTLE PIECE OF POTATO POO I'LL NIBBLE OFF YOUR TOES AND FINGERS AND *tackled*
17. *30 minutes later* ... *Ahems* I'm calm this time I swear. Julie, I want my johnny, I promise I won't kill anybody, or beat anybody with a petrified mummy monkey, just give me my Depp, GIVE ME NOW! We're going to go to vegas and marry and make babies! PERFECT LITTLE BOBDEPP BABIES YES GLORIOUS BABIES! AND AS FOR YOU MR. BACK TALK ME WHILE I'M POSTING YOU JUST WAIT TILL I FIND OUT WHERE YOU LIVE BECAUSE I'M GOING TO SICK MY RABID LASER EYED MONKEY SPRINKLES ON YOU AND WATCH IT FRY OFF YOUR BELLY BUTTON AHAHAHAHAAH *tackled and knocked unconcious*
18. *drooling, half unconcious* jooooooooooooooooooooooooohnny.....baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabies......
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaant......
posted by _x_XtReMe_x_ at 4:30 PM
